Saturday 19th June - A day of boredom and regretting not going to a field to participate in a pikey fight :/

Firstly, hello to Bella C, whoever she may be/if she actually exists :S Yeah, I randomly got an email today from someone called Bella C who said she liked my blog and invited me to some fashiony website, I'm not entirely sure what it is yet :L
Still, I have no idea if it's genuine or my friends have decided to prank me. Bastards.
Happy Fact - Paloma Faith's album Stone Cold Sober. It's awesome. Everyone go to HMV or Zavvi or wherever and buy it, because it's so good :) Plus I just watched her on Never Mind The Buzzcocks on Dave (no matter what everyone says, it's such a decent channel :L). Although she was wearing an outfit consisting mainly of pom poms, she was nice and normal and sang, and I think I'm a little bit in love with her... AND SO SHOULD YOU BE!
Happy Fact 2 - Exams have finished! Hell to the yeah lads, I'm a-level free until January :D Sadly I started A2s on Wednesday, and already have 7 pieces of homeowrk, when everyone else in my year has like 2. My teachers hate me, its official. Even though I give them nothing but love! Now that I think about it, I love Grimmett and he ignores me (sob) I loved my maths teacher in Year 9 and he would never help me when I got stuck! And most importantly, I loved Mr Eastwood and he called me Rachel. RACHEL!! Shocking.
I don't even look like a Rachel.
I don't even know a Rachel.
I don't think we even have someone called Rachel in our year group...
Wanker :(
Anyway that took far too long so Happy Facts 3 4 and 5 are just gonna have to be Jeans, Noel Fielding and Betty Croker's Chocolate Icing, which currently lives in my fridge :D It's great, whenever I go to get a drink I have a sneaky little fingerful :P That sounded less sexual in my head.
So chaps, the World Cup is HERE! I should've said that about a week ago but, you'll just have to deal with my bad time management, cry as you may :/ I'm a bit of a man when it comes to football (World Cup football anyway, the rest can shove off, who cares about Sunderland FC and that lot :L). I just kinda sit in front of the TV for like 4 hours of the day, looking like I'm in a coma with a bottle of beer in my hand. Even my brother is less into it than me.But yeah, England suck, screw the lot of them!! Apart from Fabio, who should live forever and rule the world.
In other news, today I drew a dead cow :) It was for a reason, but I secretly wish it wasn't and was just some totally spontaneous act of randomness that I decided to perform, purely in the name of being a little bit strange :)
Unfortunately, it was French. Don't ask why Mr Pugh felt it was necessary to get 7 16 year old girls to draw dead cows, it just was. I'm actually doubting whether I did get this homework, or just dreamt I did... how worrying.
I suppose you're wondering "but I don't UNDERSTAND! What do dead cows and football and icing have to do with battles between southern farmer folk?!" Well my friends, today was the Portishead carnival. For those of you who don't know, Portishead is a shitty little village in the South West, near to Bristol, where my school and freinds live. It's a small, simple area corner of the world, which forgot to enter the 20th century and all its inhabitants are clinically insane and don't shower. I wish I could say I'm proud to go to school there, but I don't want to lie to you. It's a shit hole.
But once a year, all the rides from Funderworld (the greastest even in history!!) decide to linger around a field in this crappy little town and lots of rowdy teenagers go on them and use it as an excuse to get trashed. And everyone else makes little floats and smiles and waves, like the brain dead empty shells they are. Its a 'lovely' event, where the community really comes together, emphasising the fact that everyone who lives there has an IQ lower than a dog and can't count to 6 because that involves using more than the fingers on one hand. To be fair to them, if one hand is held up, and the other is tapping of the fingers as they go along, is it any wonder that they get confused? And besides, they're also too high on the smell of manure and cider to notice anyway :)
BUT! This year, horror strikes!! A couple of weeks ago it was Pill RAG (Pill, is slightly worse than Portishead: at least in phead I know some people and there are one or two friendly farmers, eveyone in Pill's a chav) and apparently everyone got drunk and things got really out of control. There was a huge riot and someone was carrying golf balls around in a sock and hitting people in the face and stuff. Basically just recall the scene from Anchorman where the radio presenters have a fight :L And Brick "killed a man with a trident" LOL. Alternatively imagine what would happen if you took away the coffee machine from a typical office :L
So yeah, basically there were rumours that that was gonna happen at portishead carnival, so i decided to skip out on it, when ordinarily I'd go and have a laugh with my mates, and then pretend to sign up for the army, who are always there. It's fun times. But yeah, I didnt really fancy a baseball to the chest or a snooker cue to the eye or whatever, and then spend the rest of my saturday in A and E.It just doesn't sound like a good day to me... I'm much happier with my dead cow thank you very much. He's pretty cool actually, for someone who can't draw :) I'm quite tempted to take a picture and scan it into this post :) Or at least I would if I had a camera that held battery for more that 4 seconds, and a scanner attached to my laptop. I might call him Udders :)
You should be jealous of me and Udders, raving in my room :P It's awesome.
Still, though Udders is very fun, albeit inanimate, I think I would've had a better day at the carnival, even if I did end up in hospital, as opposed to my day of nothing. I watched the football, created Udders and that's the only thing worth a mention. I'm so bored! My skull feels empty my brain has shrunk so much due to disuse.
Plus I think this is like the longest post I've written since, what last August! (I have no idea, did I even post anything last August? Who cares?!)
Right, bedtime, I'm shattered!
God I must be the most insufferable person! I'm in a comatose for the most part of the day, then proceed by doing nothing, followed by bed. Sorry readers, I promise to try and make my life more exciting and enjoyable for you all to read about.
Not.
Laterss xx